Saturday, November 15, 2014

Being Healthy And Your Happiness

Asking the why's about your fitness level can uncover the answer to your weight problems as well as your happiness level. By taking most of this year to figure out how my body interacts with certain foods, with or without alcohol, and gym activity, I have come closer than ever to unlocking the answer to achieving optimal health.  Unlocking what works also will translate to how you feel day to day and can help reduce depression, stress, and also your waistline.

Friday, October 31, 2014

Redefining Black

All my life, I never took offense to the line "your the whitest black guy I know". It's as if the way I carry myself and the way I talk should be your typical Ebonics slang speaking thug that is portrayed in today's urban city society. Since seeing all the racial cases making it's way to American media, from Fergusun to how we treat the commander in chief, when a slight mistake may come about (Obama's Coffee Salute). It makes me wonder, why is being black such a topic of controversy when it's negative.

I grew up in a household where education was sought after by my parents, immigrants from Nigeria trying to make the best for their children. But it was see as I do in my eyes and not my parents sitting my down and making homework be the number one priority. I found it upon myself to do all the homework and seek 4.0's to make my parents proud. (Something I still I haven't been able to accomplish). I was bullied by my own siblings simply cause I made them look bad academically. English and writing were my favorite classes. Speaking and learning how to pronounce big words and grammar was the best thing since sliced bread. Kids usually going to school in Detroit aren't fans of homework or school for the matter. The bullying went beyond home and into the playground. Adding the chubby kid factor. Couldn't ride a bike, shoot a basket, or do "cool" things didn't help the situation. But my love for technology and computers was my getaway. Learning how to 56K my way to the Internet. Read the news, look at stocks, and order shoes online (Eastbay from catalogs to the internet ) was simply amazing for an 8 year old. You try installing Windows 3.1 with floppy disks at home and upgrading your local church's computers to Windows 98 SE. Not your typical black kid living off 7 Mile Rd and Hoover in Detroit.

Once I moved to the suburbs and realized my parents could care less about if I did my homework when I asked for help, it was easy to begin hanging out with the wrong crowd. I still enjoyed theater, football, and student government, but I felt I was invincible. No need to study or take things seriously. Things will fall into place after high school and i'll be fucking rich. Almost 8 years in community college and I've barely hit enough credits to be a sophomore. I started drinking, smoking weed with cool kids, and staying out till sunrise. Having my brother's ID helped getting into bars and supplying my friends even easier.

Not all was lost. It was at 18 I discovered traveling and flew off to Amsterdam for Spring Break while everyone else was heading to Cancun for a tan and fucking the girls of Cousino High School. I learned very early that life is not cookie cutter. Still the stereotypes of a black man always followed. Just because I walked the streets late at night, police being called cause I fit a description or being pulled over constantly where I had registration and driver's license ready as soon as the lights came on. I wasn't 100% innocent either. Driving on a suspended, expired plates, and even getting my car repossessed eventually. In that regard, I fit the right black man characteristics. Eventually getting myself in enough trouble at 19 to see a jail cell twice and now a felon. But still I make myself worthy enough by learning new computer languages, continue writing (blogging), and putting myself in awkward situations to ask questions. I've seen a lot of cool shit and made friends along the way.

Being black doesn't have to be constantly feeling oppressed and blaming someone else for your faults. Black people need to take some kind of responsibility for the state we're in. Yes, it's easy to fall into society's equilibrium  or lack there of. People throughout history had to provoke change and be heard. People may look at protests of a white cop shooting an unarmed black teen as racial, but it goes beyond that. We have yet to talk about racism, our polarized education system, and our crumbling urban neighborhoods. Listening to the other side is what black people aren't doing and having dialogue that doesn't lead right to anger. Not to say we haven't moved forward, but we have a long way to go.

I'm going to continue to be that token black guy, but I'll embrace it and show people there's no reason we can't all get along. Even in this new chapter of my life, I'm learning that I have to be a voice of reason. We can't continue to call people faggots and think it's ok because were among friends. Even saying the word within gay circles is the same thing like black people saying nigga to each other. I'll go ahead and continue being black, which means being myself and showing people there's more to it than what we've been taught to believe. 

Sunday, September 7, 2014


Seems like new posts are a rarity when it comes to me giving you my inner most personal thoughts on my views on an array of topics. Didn't see this as the most appropriate outlet for me to say what's on my mind, but when I have over 10,000 views and 300 just these past few weeks, I wonder if I'm getting punked or if I should give an update more frequently.

I attempted uploading pictures from my latest trip onto my blog last time around in July. The speeds in Croatia weren't the best for uploading tons of pictures and I just felt like I was boasting then sharing.

I haven't shared a lot of things since I've been seeking to know who I am and where I am going. Seems like I can't make up my mind to stay in America or just leave for Europe. But is that just a cop out on all the things I still have yet to do here. Not to say that I can't just book a flight and travel when I want to (or can afford to), but would moving really solve anything. I think I'll know the answer in due time.

The other small thing in my life the last few months was discovering my sexual orientation. After years of being straight, bi, curious, discreet, jock, athletic, top, bottom (learning new terms everyday still), I decided to share with my family and closest friends that I was gay. It didn't seem like a big deal to come out since I've pretty much known for quite sometime. The fear was how I'd be treated even though nothing had changed about me the person. Hiding from the obvious fact that has been lingering for a few years just wasn't what I was about. Being truthful to myself involves also being true to the people around me. It's easy for me to shun people out, not stand up for small battles, or simply just ignore everything and go into hiding. By coming out, it allowed me to do more self exploring. Asking myself questions that I once would shy away from. I don't expect to answer all the  questions of life so easily, but the conversation has at least begun and really the only thing I can do is move on with life and explore it for what it is. I can not be afraid of who I am and stand out from the crowd of many. Being unique by creating, learning, and changing the world like I said when I was at a very young age.

Since life isn't easy, I won't take take the easy road. Going back to pursuing my education on a more full time basis, continuing my iOS projects, and being an entrepreneur are only going to shape me to better position myself. I've managed to meet people from all over the world and see the world that they live in. Feeling that I must follow a certain route to success and appease a certain few that want me to strive for a circle of crowded dreamers will have to be left to those who seek to think small. I've always gone my own way and will continue to do so. Fear might have shielded me from full potential, but I won't let it consume me.

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Life Through Water

The water is the calm. There is no storm coming after. Life's hourglass can be reversed several times while exploring the earths wonders and searching for who to share it with. It is not in our nature to live chasing objects to make us whole. Looking beyond the never ending sea, the only sound is the water itself. In every direction you can find your own way. There is no wrong direction. If you choose to be happy whichever way you go, then you have found your path.

Sunday, July 6, 2014


The hiatus of not knowing what's going on with yours truly is now over. You can now commence with the other three people who read this blog and rejoice in my return. I was too busy through a life transition to type out the ways of the world.

Now that I'm 5,000 miles away from home, thought this would be the perfect opportunity to share my experiences. The sun is rising right about now, not yet to the hot temperatures I've experience for the last few days, and the Mediterranean Sea is still as blue as ever.

Spending the next week in Croatia with my good friend Kyle. It's all about sight seeing, people watching/meeting people, the Sea, and good food. I'll try to post all my pictures as the days go on.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program - Curtis Chude dot com.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Male Feminist

Never thought to look at the definition of feminists until the word continued to circulate in stories where equality for women was brought up. The word by definition sounds like its pretty straight forward.

feminist advocates or supports the rights and equality of women. 

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Killing Yet Saving Black America

I look in the mirror at a man that has the power to change the world. Ideas come to mind on how to make things simpler for everyone. How to measure my success can be typed onto a keyboard and printed to remind myself to always reach high. But why has this characteristic been instilled in me and not the majority of Black America.

If statistics were any indication on where are black youth would end up, why try any harder in trying to shut down skeptics. There are more black men in the United States prison system than any other race. Blacks still don't share even a fraction of the wealth as whites in this country. We must look at the past to understand why this is.

It wasn't until the Civil Rights Bills of 1964 that segregation ended in America. When I say ended, that's only on paper and not in people's minds. Seeing that you can't change someone's perception with an act of Congress, bigotry and racism still existed/exists in America. Civil Rights and the dark past of slavery in America has continued to influence each generation and how we look at race. Instead of having a conversation about race, we wait until tragedy before acknowledging that we have a problem on how we treat black people.

The current "War On Young Black Men" has no voice on how we fix it from anyone in the media. More worried about getting more ratings for court trials instead of giving ways we could end this "War". The youth of Chicago, kids like Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis, and the education we give poor neighborhoods are more of a spectacle than showing those who are pushing for change.

Let's look at the stereotypes of black men in America. Being lazy, not able to take of their children, being a danger to society are all related to the idea that black people, because of the color of their skin in the slavery era, were different from the common man. The color of our skin quickly is connected with negative characteristics instead of knowing the person first. We take what we know of the "common" black person in America and tie it in with all black people. If anyone speaks on this, black or white, someone gets defensive and apologetic for having a conversation so no one comes off as racist. Why? We should become defensive as black people and give our story. If you are better than the average American, say it with pride no matter what race you are. It's become normal to know that we have a race problem, but let time dictate how racial relations will get better.

Spike Lee was labeled as a racist for his views on gentrification. When all he said was what no else would.


I've been treated both fairly and unfairly based off the color of my skin. And no one knows exactly how I feel other than other black people who don't speak on this issue.
If we look at our education system in black neighborhoods, the role model in the home of black America, and the jobs that black people get based off education, we could solve a lot of problems.

As a black man labeled as felon, I now am a second class citizen. When I look for a job, apply for a loan, enter a relationship, or anything that depends on trust - I am looked at with a watchful eye until I prove myself. If I told you that others that have committed worst crimes than mine and were given lesser sentences in the same court room on the same day with the same judge was unfair, you'd still say I probably shouldn't of committed a crime and I received what was due instead of looking at the way we prosecute. We have a fundamental problem in America with accepting people as equal and it will haunt us until we act and have a conversation. We as black people don't need our own month, our own organizations to only move our own people ahead, or only think were only susceptible to success when one of us makes it and we follow that same route.

I will never be a famous athlete, go to an ivy league school, or be a billionaire. And not because I don't have the opportunity, but because I'm a realist. I will find success and then begin to knock on the doors of the naysayers to let others like me in. I won't go out of my way to reach for a goal that everyone's going for just to say I did it. I'm going to do what makes me happy and tell others to do the same. If monetary gain is the only way black people think success is measured, were not looking at the bigger picture. Say what you will, but until race is transparent, there are undertones that we must all get over and making equality prevalent.

Watching the gay movement all over the media for the last couple of years become bigger than anyone probably anticipated, but where is the movement on asking more of a government that still can't get over how I look much less who I'm in love with.