Sunday, September 7, 2014


Seems like new posts are a rarity when it comes to me giving you my inner most personal thoughts on my views on an array of topics. Didn't see this as the most appropriate outlet for me to say what's on my mind, but when I have over 10,000 views and 300 just these past few weeks, I wonder if I'm getting punked or if I should give an update more frequently.

I attempted uploading pictures from my latest trip onto my blog last time around in July. The speeds in Croatia weren't the best for uploading tons of pictures and I just felt like I was boasting then sharing.

I haven't shared a lot of things since I've been seeking to know who I am and where I am going. Seems like I can't make up my mind to stay in America or just leave for Europe. But is that just a cop out on all the things I still have yet to do here. Not to say that I can't just book a flight and travel when I want to (or can afford to), but would moving really solve anything. I think I'll know the answer in due time.

The other small thing in my life the last few months was discovering my sexual orientation. After years of being straight, bi, curious, discreet, jock, athletic, top, bottom (learning new terms everyday still), I decided to share with my family and closest friends that I was gay. It didn't seem like a big deal to come out since I've pretty much known for quite sometime. The fear was how I'd be treated even though nothing had changed about me the person. Hiding from the obvious fact that has been lingering for a few years just wasn't what I was about. Being truthful to myself involves also being true to the people around me. It's easy for me to shun people out, not stand up for small battles, or simply just ignore everything and go into hiding. By coming out, it allowed me to do more self exploring. Asking myself questions that I once would shy away from. I don't expect to answer all the  questions of life so easily, but the conversation has at least begun and really the only thing I can do is move on with life and explore it for what it is. I can not be afraid of who I am and stand out from the crowd of many. Being unique by creating, learning, and changing the world like I said when I was at a very young age.

Since life isn't easy, I won't take take the easy road. Going back to pursuing my education on a more full time basis, continuing my iOS projects, and being an entrepreneur are only going to shape me to better position myself. I've managed to meet people from all over the world and see the world that they live in. Feeling that I must follow a certain route to success and appease a certain few that want me to strive for a circle of crowded dreamers will have to be left to those who seek to think small. I've always gone my own way and will continue to do so. Fear might have shielded me from full potential, but I won't let it consume me.

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Life Through Water

The water is the calm. There is no storm coming after. Life's hourglass can be reversed several times while exploring the earths wonders and searching for who to share it with. It is not in our nature to live chasing objects to make us whole. Looking beyond the never ending sea, the only sound is the water itself. In every direction you can find your own way. There is no wrong direction. If you choose to be happy whichever way you go, then you have found your path.

Sunday, July 6, 2014


The hiatus of not knowing what's going on with yours truly is now over. You can now commence with the other three people who read this blog and rejoice in my return. I was too busy through a life transition to type out the ways of the world.

Now that I'm 5,000 miles away from home, thought this would be the perfect opportunity to share my experiences. The sun is rising right about now, not yet to the hot temperatures I've experience for the last few days, and the Mediterranean Sea is still as blue as ever.

Spending the next week in Croatia with my good friend Kyle. It's all about sight seeing, people watching/meeting people, the Sea, and good food. I'll try to post all my pictures as the days go on.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program - Curtis Chude dot com.

Monday, March 24, 2014

Male Feminist

Never thought to look at the definition of feminists until the word continued to circulate in stories where equality for women was brought up. The word by definition sounds like its pretty straight forward.

feminist advocates or supports the rights and equality of women. 

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Killing Yet Saving Black America

I look in the mirror at a man that has the power to change the world. Ideas come to mind on how to make things simpler for everyone. How to measure my success can be typed onto a keyboard and printed to remind myself to always reach high. But why has this characteristic been instilled in me and not the majority of Black America.

If statistics were any indication on where are black youth would end up, why try any harder in trying to shut down skeptics. There are more black men in the United States prison system than any other race. Blacks still don't share even a fraction of the wealth as whites in this country. We must look at the past to understand why this is.

It wasn't until the Civil Rights Bills of 1964 that segregation ended in America. When I say ended, that's only on paper and not in people's minds. Seeing that you can't change someone's perception with an act of Congress, bigotry and racism still existed/exists in America. Civil Rights and the dark past of slavery in America has continued to influence each generation and how we look at race. Instead of having a conversation about race, we wait until tragedy before acknowledging that we have a problem on how we treat black people.

The current "War On Young Black Men" has no voice on how we fix it from anyone in the media. More worried about getting more ratings for court trials instead of giving ways we could end this "War". The youth of Chicago, kids like Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis, and the education we give poor neighborhoods are more of a spectacle than showing those who are pushing for change.

Let's look at the stereotypes of black men in America. Being lazy, not able to take of their children, being a danger to society are all related to the idea that black people, because of the color of their skin in the slavery era, were different from the common man. The color of our skin quickly is connected with negative characteristics instead of knowing the person first. We take what we know of the "common" black person in America and tie it in with all black people. If anyone speaks on this, black or white, someone gets defensive and apologetic for having a conversation so no one comes off as racist. Why? We should become defensive as black people and give our story. If you are better than the average American, say it with pride no matter what race you are. It's become normal to know that we have a race problem, but let time dictate how racial relations will get better.

Spike Lee was labeled as a racist for his views on gentrification. When all he said was what no else would.


I've been treated both fairly and unfairly based off the color of my skin. And no one knows exactly how I feel other than other black people who don't speak on this issue.
If we look at our education system in black neighborhoods, the role model in the home of black America, and the jobs that black people get based off education, we could solve a lot of problems.

As a black man labeled as felon, I now am a second class citizen. When I look for a job, apply for a loan, enter a relationship, or anything that depends on trust - I am looked at with a watchful eye until I prove myself. If I told you that others that have committed worst crimes than mine and were given lesser sentences in the same court room on the same day with the same judge was unfair, you'd still say I probably shouldn't of committed a crime and I received what was due instead of looking at the way we prosecute. We have a fundamental problem in America with accepting people as equal and it will haunt us until we act and have a conversation. We as black people don't need our own month, our own organizations to only move our own people ahead, or only think were only susceptible to success when one of us makes it and we follow that same route.

I will never be a famous athlete, go to an ivy league school, or be a billionaire. And not because I don't have the opportunity, but because I'm a realist. I will find success and then begin to knock on the doors of the naysayers to let others like me in. I won't go out of my way to reach for a goal that everyone's going for just to say I did it. I'm going to do what makes me happy and tell others to do the same. If monetary gain is the only way black people think success is measured, were not looking at the bigger picture. Say what you will, but until race is transparent, there are undertones that we must all get over and making equality prevalent.

Watching the gay movement all over the media for the last couple of years become bigger than anyone probably anticipated, but where is the movement on asking more of a government that still can't get over how I look much less who I'm in love with.

Friday, February 7, 2014

Curtis Chude played by Curtis Chude

The reality TV series that I felt I played the lead role in my own life is becoming a lot more realistic than just going through the motions. After working at Best Buy Co., for over 6 and a half years, I'm finally no longer with a company that took me for granted, slaved me through weekends and ridiculous holidays, and being treated like a second rate citizen. 

It would be easy for me to wish the worst upon a company, but I learned so much on the way business works, how to interact and manage employees, and seek the best resolution in the darkest circumstances. If I'd stayed there and felt miserable like I had been the last 3 years, I would of eventually been told to produce more to an unrealistic company set goal. 

It's now amazing to see and begin to fulfill my potential that I've left on the table for so long. Wondering if I'd ever be employed by another company, how my criminal background had made me believe I had no place to go, and being so naive to think that others cared about my well being when it was just to line their pockets with more money based off my performance results. 

Now is the time to begin a new company of my own and create something I believe will change whatever industry I set my mind to. 2014 will finally see my app in the App Store, becoming a Certified Personal Trainer, becoming a full fledged entrepreneur, and sharing more of my ups and downs right here. Did I mention have fun finally - sometime this site can be a fucking downer.

Off to San Francisco next week to explore the US a bit more. 

Friday, January 24, 2014

ISP Killed The Video Star: Net Neutrality

Since there's soooo much talk about net neutrality (sense the sarcasm there). But this could get really messy if consumers don't act and stand for equality on the internet.

And it's already started. Imaging that 4GB data plan on AT&T being untouched while streaming unlimited movies on Netflix. Sounds great right. For just a small fee per month, Netflix will subsidize your data plan and you get to watch House of Cards while you sit on the john at work without ever worrying about that data cap.

Now Amazon wants you to get a Prime account to get that free 2 Day Shipping on that new Hyena by Jude Angelini. No problem, just 3.99 a month on your wireless bill and you can buy more books and watch anything you like data cap free.

Want to stalk that ex-girlfriend/ex-boyfriend and upload side selfies on Facebook and Instagram. Dropbox would love to store your data too. And you guessed it will only cost you a few bucks a month and your data plan is safe to browse the rest of the inter webs.

You probably see where I am going with this - Net Neutrality rules not being in place can shake up the wireless phone industry. And imagine trying to visit your favorite news site and it being blocked by Comcast because you haven't paid that access fee for some liberal news gossip that's not really news.

It's all part of why you should step up, be heard, and tell your friends. What's next you can't access PORN!