Off The Wall

Well hello 2017. This blog is still going strong and I'm getting older. And who the fuck is reading this still? You're probably here because you noticed the @curtischude.com at the end of my email. So welcome if you're new.

I haven't ranted and raved on here like years past, but here to change that.

First, why have I not been posting? I think there's a period where life was pretty tame and I was able to smile a little bit and progress as an adult. But life isn't supposed to be easy right?  Always something unplanned for comes and just fuck things up. And one of those things was apparently myself. Yeah - me. I have been in the way of my own success and becoming more apparent everyday I have to do something about it.

If you don't love thyself, no one will.

One of the things I really have a hard time with is loving the body I'm in. Since I can remember, I've always been somewhat ashamed or embarrassed about my appearance. Fat kid turned bigger kid turned almost skinny fat kid. Food and I always had a rocky relationship. Butter, sugar, and bad fats are like a bad porno. (Mmmmm tell me more) Let's be honest, all bad food taste good. I've restricted myself on the goodies and as of late, let go of the booze. Not cause I'm an every alcoholic, but what's best for the body.
Next is to stop eating so much bullshit processed snacks at work. Shit is bad for you.So I think what would make me happy is dropping about 30 lbs. Yeah, it's a lot but I like going for goals that are hard yet achievable. So I'll be talking more about that as I dust off the old fingers and get back into this.

The other thing that's been bothering me is the entitlement of people in the Bay Area.

Moving to California has been a blessing and I'm grateful to have opportunities in my life that I thought I'd never have. Honestly thought I'd either be dead or in jail right now. I know I possess the talent to be great, but living with depression - you sometimes think the worst of things until someone tells you different. Back to Californians. I really would like people here to know something, no one gives a flying fuck about your last job and how cool it was or the fact that you got to a destination first or you have a lot of money. Most of you need to experience having nothing. Just the clothes on your back, so you can appreciate the things you have. With much of the GDP of the US coming from California, why can't a fellow man help the homeless here. Now it's a mental health crisis roaming the streets of not only LA, but right here in San Francisco. Just want to grab a bell and yell "Shame".

Ok. I need to breath. Whew. This feels good coming back to writing to myself and thinking someone gives a shit.

Until next time.