The past still seems to follow me with each phone call, missed job opportunities, and the desire to succeed in my own realm of knowledge. Seeking riches in today's day and age is almost so simple to be explained on paper and to other friends, but completing the idea is as hard as AP classes in high school.
I'm drawn back on the possibility of being ousted as an entrepreneur, the lack of funds to seek my dream of a college education, and the love lost between mother and father as illness grows in their home with none of their kids by their side. Never have I felt so alone in a world filled with people that enjoy my presence and my knowledge. Crediting my accolades only by documentation which is hard to find.
The legal system is felt around my neck shaking whatever monetary or emotional gain I accomplish. Trails of paperwork of debt to them is more apparent than what I truly can do with my skill set.
My place of work is dashed of ever creating reform, but stepping on the toes of veterans by just following the guidelines set out by my superiors. I could easily become my own boss, but risk of failure that once never plagued me as a child now brings too many questions of 'what if'. So much easier to sit and watch the world pass me by then to stand up to each problem, but there are only 24 hours in a day, only 365 days a year.
The foundation is drying more quickly. Rebuilding is inevitable.